A Perspective on "Home"
Below is an entry written by my friend Rachel. Rachel grew up in different areas of the world...she went from the mid-western United States to East Asia to Pennsylvania. All very different places to call home.
Something that many TCKs struggle with is how to answer the question "Where are you from?"
My personal answer is "I moved here from Orlando" - with that, the asker naturally assumes I'm from Orlando. I'm not lying - I moved to Birmingham from Orlando...but if they press a little more I tell them I grew up in Central Europe because my parents work there. Sometimes, this provokes further conversation and other times it shuts the conversation down.
One of the reasons TCKs struggle with answering this question is because we've said "Oh, I'm from Romania" and then an accusatory "You don't have an accent" comes our way. I had Hungary listed on my nametag as to where I'm from the whole time I worked at SeaWorld and many times guests would say things along those lines. Other times, Hungarian guests would surprise me and begin speaking Hungarian to me immediately - and then I'd let them down because I wasn't able to discuss stingray and shark anatomy in their mother-tongue.
As I've gotten older, when I tell people "I'm going home" for whatever reason, I consider "home" wherever my parents happen to be at the time. As you hear more stories from TCKs you'll begin to recognize this theme, and "home" is a relational place and less of a geographic place. There are exceptions to this, but more often than not this will be the case.
A big thank you to Rachel for contributing and sharing her thoughts.
Something that many TCKs struggle with is how to answer the question "Where are you from?"
My personal answer is "I moved here from Orlando" - with that, the asker naturally assumes I'm from Orlando. I'm not lying - I moved to Birmingham from Orlando...but if they press a little more I tell them I grew up in Central Europe because my parents work there. Sometimes, this provokes further conversation and other times it shuts the conversation down.
One of the reasons TCKs struggle with answering this question is because we've said "Oh, I'm from Romania" and then an accusatory "You don't have an accent" comes our way. I had Hungary listed on my nametag as to where I'm from the whole time I worked at SeaWorld and many times guests would say things along those lines. Other times, Hungarian guests would surprise me and begin speaking Hungarian to me immediately - and then I'd let them down because I wasn't able to discuss stingray and shark anatomy in their mother-tongue.
As I've gotten older, when I tell people "I'm going home" for whatever reason, I consider "home" wherever my parents happen to be at the time. As you hear more stories from TCKs you'll begin to recognize this theme, and "home" is a relational place and less of a geographic place. There are exceptions to this, but more often than not this will be the case.
A big thank you to Rachel for contributing and sharing her thoughts.
"Where's home for you?" are familiar, obligatory questions of cerebral, getting-to-know-you small talk. Yet they are complicated questions for me, with even more complicated answers. My head races. "Indiana, where I was born?" "Pennsylvania, where I spent most of my younger childhood and college years?" "China, where I lived for most of middle school and high school?" My heart soon follows in tow asking in response to the complexity and confusion, "Where do I belong?" Finding a satisfying answer to that question has been a lifelong journey, and an adventure. One truth I have gleaned upon much reflection and that I cling to is epitomized in this song lyric. Home is more about the relationships that matter to you than it is about a zip code. Watercolor and pen that I made last year when I was living overseas.
Watercolor and words by Rachel Ogden. Rachel grew up in Asia but moved around the States before and after her time in Asia. Rachel has a great gift of words. You can follow her on Instagram at @rachel11lou.
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